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Category: Humor/Irony/Absurdity

Speaking of Mindfulness…

Speaking of mindfulness, I just got out of the shower and discovered I had only shaved one leg. And I have two. Legs, that is. On an unrelated note, also speaking of mindfulness, I opted to eat 5 mini-snickers after a pretty heavy therapy session the other day. But! I knew I was emotionally eating while I emotionally ate. Hence, mindfulness. Today, I also opted to be aware I was emotionally eating while I emotionally ate a large quantity of Lays and french onion dip. Then I demanded to my husband that he should let me unilaterally name our baby this amazing name I made up, which he thinks sounds like a brand of eye drops, and while we’re at it, he should also let me decorate our apartment exactly the way I want it with no input from him. As I said it, I knew I was being ridiculous. So yes, I was being pretty mindful. He laughed, which is the only kind response when your wife is getting a bit nutty and approaching the third trimester of pregnancy (are those two things related?). It’s so great to be a self-aware wreck. On…