Do you ever find yourself wishing for misfortune to befall you so that you will be forced to do what you want to do but feel that you can’t do for one reason or another? Please tell me I’m not the only one. For example, do you ever… -Wish you would lose your job and be unable to find another one, so that you would be forced to pursue your dream of becoming a famous actor/writer/comedian/entrepreneur? -Wish you would find out your partner was cheating on you so you’d have an excuse to leave them? -Wish you would survive a terrible car accident and require months of rehab so you would be forced to drop out of school/quit your job/spend more time with family/focus on what is most important to you? -Wish you would find out your house/apartment has black mold/was a meth house so you would be forced to move? We want life to force us to make the decisions we want to make, to force us to take the action we want to take. I realized I was doing this when I found…
“No regrets.” It’s a phrase I will probably never understand. All I think when I see a meme like this: this, or this is….seriously? For real, bro? There’s nothing in your past you wish you could change? On the one hand, there is the whole, “I ate 3 more tacos after I was full… no regrets” kind of no regrets. You know, or the “I danced ‘The Macarena’ in front of my entire office…no regrets” kind of no regrets. But what about times we have just plain screwed up? When I hear these inspirational quotes about how you should have no regrets, because your choices have made you who you are today, and mistakes are just lessons learned, I am left thinking, “yeah, but what about the impact our choices have on other people?” Yes, the other humans who inhabit this planet. We don’t live in a vacuum; our choices have consequences for us and for other people as well. If I could go back and change the ways I have hurt people, I would do it in…
Disclosure: some of the links below are affiliate links, meaning, at no additional cost to you, I will earn a commission if you click through and make a purchase. Thanks for supporting Home In Wonderland! When I was nearing time to give birth to Warrior Girl, they were going to induce me because labor hadn’t started some 12 hours after my water broke. Consequently, they had me lying in the bed hooked up to a fetal monitor. Nurses kept coming in to adjust things and check me, looking rushed and somewhat concerned. I hated it. I wasn’t even technically in labor, but I felt every little cramp and pain lying in that bed. Fortunately, I went into labor literally moments before they were about to induce me. Once they determined I didn’t have to be induced, I was out of bed like a rocket, power walking the halls like “I’m in labor ya’ll!” Some hours later, I was in the bathtub feeling calm and serene when I suddenly vomited multiple times in a row and felt overwhelmed with an energy that tore through me and made me feel…
(Image Credit llreadll) One time, my friend had what I like to call “a moment of clarity.” That is, a moment of awakening, a moment in which she was at peace, a moment in which her thinking mind had stopped trying to figure out ALL THE THINGS, and paradoxically, it all made sense. How do I know this? Because for about 60 seconds, she had a look of wonder on her face. And then panic. Then she said something to the effect of, “But how do you hold on to this?” Which is nothing but the hallmark of a fleeting experience of awakening. And it’s frequently those very words, thought or verbalized, which bring it to an end. I could never forget being there when this happened for my friend. My friend, on the other hand, had completely forgotten about it two years later. How could that be? I like to think of our minds as containing a vast maze of filing cabinets. All incoming data is processed through the dependable-yet-conventional filing lady, Mildred. Mildred always wears sensible shoes. She is very kindly, and she isn’t taking any chances with our well-being. She does…
Row, Row, Row Your Boat: Wisdom for the ages. An exploration of the nothing matters/everything matters paradox. A beautiful image of the unfolding of wisdom, of awakening. For me, this nursery rhyme ranks up there with advice from the spiritual masters. Also, I tend to get all awkwardly deep about random, casual things and I thought the internet was the perfect place to unleash my weirdness on this topic. Let’s break it down, shall we? Only let’s do it backwards. Life is but a dream… During moments of clarity, across time and cultures, people have been struck with a realization that the world as we know it is illusion. We only interact with the world though our paradigms, what we view as solid is shifting, who we think we are is not real, we see only “through a glass darkly.” We realize all we stress about and strive for and obsess over is only “dust in the wind” and all our busy comings and goings cannot change the Truth of Our Being. When this happens, it is like a 2×4 to the head which puts everything into perspective…
I come out firmly on the side of yes. Yes, altruism exists. Yes, people can do what is right. I have seen it in person, and I have read of it happening…
Word to the Reader: These posts contain affiliate links, meaning a percentage of the purchases made through some of the links on my site go to support this blog at no extra cost to you! I only link to products I love, because obviously. Remember growing up, and rolling your eyes as your parents droned, “With privilege comes responsibility” for the hundredth time? Or is that just me? Most of us humans believe we deeply value and desire freedom. This is certainly part of the story, but the reality is rather more counterintuitive. In practice, freedom creates a “dizzying” (as Kierkegaard would put it) array of possibility and choices that invoke incredible anxiety in most of us. This can certainly be seen among Millennials like myself, many of whom grew up around the idea that you can be anything you want to be, and that you should pursue your passion. But what if you don’t know what your passion is? What if there are twenty-three things you could potentially imagine doing? What if you’re the type who doesn’t want to miss a single opportunity and thus struggles to settle…